Thursday, 29 October 2009

Tinilambliphobia?

rambling-warning2

One day you get into a conversation with a complete stranger, and in passing mention that you believe there could be/has been/is/will be, life elsewhere in this universe; life that exists on at least one other planet circling amongst the trillions of stars, within the billions of galaxies expanding ever outwards, in this marvellous expanse of wonder we love to call home; then a high percentage of those complete strangers — on this particular spinning ball of blue-green luminescence which has (over the eons) contained a morass of life, will laugh at you and walk away shaking their heads in disbelief, wondering how anyone could be so foolish.

Very strange.

Before you dismiss their short-sightedness (or my stupid naivety) however, ask as many people as you feel comfortable asking, how many of them wholeheartedly believe in god(s), angels, demons, the devil, a higher force, a lower force or that crock with a pot of gold.  Then, once they nod or shout to the rafters that they indeed do believe, ask them how many times they have seen or heard or had two-way communication with 100% certainty, hand on heart, “yes it was” said entity!

If they don’t hesitate before hitting the affirmative, use that special speed-dial number for the sanatorium and watch as their surprise proudly transfigures into spluttering disbelief as they’re carted off for a good long cooling down stretch.

But with potential planets (whether habitable for us or not) probably numbering in the billions, I think there is something out there, whether at the mindless microbial level or the highly millions-of-years-more-advanced-than-us level and we’re actually in a part of the universe they’ve penned off and designated as a zoo; which, for some bizarre reason, is the one idea which fills me with the sort of desire that would have me wheeled off for my own safety, as I start to roll around banging on the floor in hysterics. 

Perhaps if more of us looked up at a clear night-time sky and managed to see the spectacular star strewn ribbon of stars that is our own milky-way backyard, maybe then we’d have a greater appreciation that there is more to experience, more to see, more to positively hope for than our normal isolistic, inwardly gazing, navel-centric point of view, usually allows!

 

Segway one.

If you were party to a nasty vicious attack on your home, your property, your loved ones and you had the money, wouldn’t you go as far as possible to not only find out who perpetuated the crime, but “why?”   Then fall savagely onto the next stage finding out what you could have done to prevent it and take action to the fullest extent ensuring it would never ever happen again? 

Of course you would.

So you would have have thought that a government would turn heaven and earth (I can see by that glazed expression starting to fog your forehead that you know where this is going), spend huge sums of money finding out exactly what went wrong and doing all the other things an individual would do?  Of course they would, except if that could expose to the light of day a potential dirty underside to 9/11.

enquiry costs plus or minus 100% accuracyAfter thousands died, with not one hijacked plane intercepted or shot down, with over 15 military exercises running on that day, how much was actually spent on finding out what went so tragically wrong?  About $15 million dollars.  How much did the  senate spend trying to find out why monica’s knees were dirty?  About $50 million.  How much was spent on the space shuttle columbia enquiry?  About $157 million. 

Let me say again.  The greatest act of terrorism ever to be perpetrated on the ‘land of liberty, the land of the free’, merited only $15 million for an open and shut enquiry. 

And, to add more petrol to the inferno (if any were needed), there has never in the entire history of recorded catastrophes, with so many mangled bits of wreckage and twisted pieces just waiting to be minutely poured over; been such a rapid dispersal to smeltering plants around the globe, of as much evidence as this.  In relative terms, it was quicker than a corpse been hoiked from a murder scene a second after the coroner’s arrived; in case the body decomposes to quickly.  Tell that to people and you’ll generally be met with a blank look zipping from one part of their insides to the other, just waiting to connect to a spare none pre-programmed thought, before they roundly denounce you as an agent of all that’s unholy and in league with socialist scum just waiting to bring everyone down to the levels of animals, after you’ve had your wicked way with them!   Which is just a little bit to harsh a reaction when all that’s required is full and frank openness.  But as we’ve learned over centuries let alone decades, the terms “full”, “frank” and “government” don’t usually inhabit the same orbits.

What about the uk?  We have more cctv’s dotted around taking videos and pictures than any other country on the planet — including the repressive, dictatorial ones.  You would have thought with all that surveillance, as well as beat walkers, car drivers, bike riders, special constable dispensers that the crime detection and arrest figures would have made dixon of dock green spin like a dynamo with pride and terrorists arrested within a whisper of breathing a few molecules of c4.  Strangely there’s been nothing of the sort.   Even on the 6th may 2009 when a question in parliament was asked…

Mr. Evans: To ask the Secretary of State for the Home Department how many (a) arrests, (b) prosecutions and(c) convictions have been made under the (i) Terrorism Act 2000 and (ii) Terrorism Act 2006 in each year since their implementation. [272196]”

the reply came back.

Mr. Coaker: The information requested is not currently available…”

hansard/uk parliament

Which for a government so caught up with league tables, spin tables, finding the best day to camouflage the worst news, is akin to finding out that one of your ancient school diner ladies, really doesn’t know how to cook lumpity custard!

Because you know that if they had 100% cast-iron, irrefutable evidence, it would have been cawed from the apex of parliaments rafters about how wonderfully successful the many rafted citizen reducing anti-terrorism barrage measures have been.  But it’s been somewhat silent on that general topic; either that or i have simply been looking in all the wrong pages. 

So what about other measures?

There are now over 500,000 communication (phone and email) intercepts by various uk authorities on the country’s citizens every year, just in case some of those bad apples are thinking disturbing and disruptive thoughts before putting a brick through a window, or stoop to nicking (thefting) a chocolate bar (worth 50p) so forcing the heavies to spend £20,000 in costs, bringing the case to court!

People who diddle the welfare state out of £2,000 are fined and given a record (as they should), diddle over £10,000 and they're more likely to be clamped in irons for half a year if not longer and their assets seized — as they should be.  But work in the city and cock something up in the name of trying to make a whopping profit, and not only are you more likely to keep your all-gotten gains (unless you really push the boat out and swindle for two-fingered billions), you'll be head-hunted to repeat the trick of bankrupting your company or at the very least working your way to a position of bringing the nation, the nation’s economy and if you can feasibly help it, the global financial system, crashing to the ground.  If that fails, and you just don’t have what it takes, there's always a post in a quango waiting to be filled, so cushioning the hardship of the feral world outside.

Population and global wealth division, plus or minus 100% accuracy

Segway two*!

In 2008, 1,125 people in the world were worth an estimated $4.4 trillion.  Of those, the top 50 had 18% of all those lovely noughts, or just a bit over $792 billion (with the top 3 at about $114 billion).  In comparison, the bottom 1,000,000,000 had a net worth of about $365 billion.  Or, to put it another way, 1 billion people on the planet were (by 2008 market valuations) worth less than half the accumulated wealth of the worlds richest 50 people.  Who said free markets don’t work?  They’ve been working perfectly and doing the job they were meant to, for years.

And so, onto… 

 

Segway three.

Hm, climate change!  Does it really matter if we've caused it or we’re just helping along a natural process?  At the end of the day we'll still be affected.  We'll still need some effective way to alleviate effect the entire gamut of change will have.  How many of us — apart from the tin-foilers — have food to last more than a week, who have enough food to last for years, let alone months?

When transportation systems, routes, food production areas, are severely disrupted or even TinFoilHatAreadestroyed through weather events, how long will food stocks last?  One week?  A month?  How long before rioting starts?  You only need to mention the possibility of oil refinery workers going on strike, or oil tanker drivers putting weights on brakes, for people to go mad on stocking up and fighting to get the last item on shelves.

The arctic is acidifying and is now (according to estimates from the university of alaska) 25% more acidic than 300 years ago, as coastal living inuits start abandoning villages as their land transforms into mushifrost.

Things are happening. 

Indeed things always happen, it just depends on the rate of change.  With this (so far) not been on the scale of the fictional piece “the day after tomorrow”, which if things were to occur at that pace would — for a while anyway — have lasered all our attention; but drip-by-drip, all around the world, lots of record-breaking weathery events just keep on occurring.  Whilst each and every minute of each and every passing day, we continue to generously pump more and more of the environment changing stuff into the atmosphere, worlds oceans and seas.

Yes things are changing, let’s hope our ability to adapt changes just as swiftly, so avoiding a seamless calamity of homosapien proportions.

For those whose knowledge of science is stretched by the “mint in a coke bottle” experiment, believe whatever you want to believe, but always try to ascertain evidence on your physical plane that bears it out, bearing in mind that experiencing something outside of your cumulative experience will immediately be coloured by what you know, what you think you know, your beliefs, your mindset and even by what your peers believe.

How many of us are going to visit alaska over a twenty year period to monitor and see the results for ourselves?  Or take out a trusty little chem-kit to test for changing ph levels of seawater, or even regularly monitor the air we breathe — freely flowing around our own back yards? 

Segway all over the place.

Maybe cod and haddock fish stocks aren't in major decline after all and we can continue fishing them like there is no tomorrow.  I’d so prefer that scenario, as after trying pollock, i’d rather eat slices of old shoe leather that had remained mouldering at the bottom of a compost heap for an epoch; before having another bite of those chewy offerings. 

Maybe buildings could incorporate tower high aquariums with 200m+ drops — full to the brim of lovely tasty fish, all ready for frying and eating — whilst acting as giant recycling & solar filtration facilities.

It seems the only other living things which appear to be adapting and contentedly thriving (from reports and statements), are seagulls, jellyfish, cockroaches, mice, rats, feral cats, feral dogs, mrsa, e-coli, salmonella, feral children and lastly cows, pigs, chickens or sheep because we eat or use them for food or clothing.

Many of us have forgotten that there really is more to life than the treadmill of the headlines.  We've been so successfully conditioned into what to believe that the treadmill is the only thing many of us accept as real, and will even willingly give our lives for.

Oh yes, tinilambliphobia – the fear of coming across a tin-foil wearing rambling nut case.

nb: all figures used in charts are accurate with a –100% to +100% range of deviation. 
* Some figures for segway two gleaned from forbes.com

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

Marching productivity

When the last person on the planet becomes superfluous to employability, as machines capable of doing everything take over; what alternative will there be for the 9+ billion inhabitants of bipedal earth caught on the endless cusp of a commercial, political, go-getting, “work is your life” productivity mantra; when the last meaningful jigsaw of hour grabbing necessity is finally handed over to never-weary, 100% self-repairing, bio-mechanical ai’s, leaving the masses with nothing more concrete than a life of dreamful idleness; what will become of the species?

Easy, nannybot will not only take care of little jill & jo — without molesting them, but also look after the needs and welfare of grandpa jack & grandma josephine, whilst making dinner, vacuuming, ensuring the fridge is fully stocked, all home repairs don— damn those jetsons!

Tuesday, 27 October 2009

Asleep

It’s been a while since last I put thought to fingers and onto keyboard, the realm of sleep kept accosting me and telling me it’s a good thing to enjoy, that and you’ll miss the utter madness that supposedly passes for city living.

It would have been wonderful to write and mean that, instead it’s been a nightmare of wakefulness tangoing with the latest heavy chemical induced beats, with bus drivers who seem to think it’s a good job to test how loud their horns are whilst revving their engines as they’ve obviously just started their shift after just watching saint clarky. Yes not impressed with the academy, or arriva bus drivers or arriva or tfl for that matter, in the slightest.

But now, at this precise moment i’m more sanguine, slightly less heated than normal, my blood pressure back down to only imminently-dangerous levels, i’ve even managed to put finishing touches to a slightly longer, more rambling bit of text that’ll be popping up later.

Till then, keep chuckling.

icon_lol

Friday, 18 September 2009

Ofsquawk

Lots of blundering ‘ofs’ with rheumy eyes, triple-calcified joints, and a short-sightedness that brings a whole new term to dystopic-malfunctioning.

Ofgem, that toothless parrot of quangos squawks again, and in response energy companies do their usual two fingered dance. 

Good to see markets are working. 

Friday, 11 September 2009

Carbonfree

And a whole new range is born with the strap-line, "made, produced, delivered and consumed, free* of carbon - guaranteed!"

* ± 100% carbon removal efficiency

Wednesday, 2 September 2009

Rich poor divide? No way!

Research conducted by martin evans and lewis williams in the department of social policy and social work at the university of oxford that compares the effects of taxes & benefits over time from 1979, 1997 and 2008, has concluded that the rich are indeed richer, the middle class about the same, and the poor even with relatively (although not special) taken into consideration, poorer in 2008.

A summary can be viewed here.

Wednesday, 26 August 2009

Trailer trash

Tired of having shows trailed for new season airings, only to see that the "big-tits" have decided in their usual way that people in a different country/continent can't watch, as they’re still waiting for the electronic transfer from the highest bidder there to flag up. 

It’s so reminiscent of that region 0-5 thing that handicapped (for two weeks) dvd players, that worked out so well.  Sort of telling people for years that “of course dvd’s cost $20 to produce, it’s an expensive process.”  Yes, expensive on their livers.

Have they learnt?  Of course not, but despite the “trillions” they're losing every year due to global piracy and talent draining from the industry, they still have enough billions to spend on films, hundreds of millions on star salaries, have the most lavish parties, awards, hire teams of lawyers, teams of judges, even teams of politicians - scrub that last bit, as we know anything over 1,000 (put your denomination here) is enough to start rubbing that particular shaft of political jiggery-pokery.

So as they still decide that we can watch when they feel we can, or listen to things only when they deem fit, I and I'm sure many others have decided that once that "cannot be viewed or listened to in your country" caption pops up, then on the block list it goes.

"Aren't you just cutting off your nose to spite your face," I hear you ask.
If it's working for the media-tits then there must be something to it. 

So when not wasting my time no longer listening or watching much, where does it all go....

worklybreakdown

Now where have i mislaid my billions?

Monday, 24 August 2009

Unintocracy

Why are we so happy in raising the flag of 'cracy, when all of them are happy allowing billions to be wasted on the growing, wastage and destruction of food, when billions in the world are starving?

Sunday, 23 August 2009

Hagsoturning

Perhaps the fbi director should look into the great big rendition waving, abuse documented, water-boarding beams that infested the denying eyes and ears of some of his collegial fellow organisations before moaning that not every one subscribes to his "execute them regardless" brand of humanity. 

Maybe the decision did have something to do with trade, or maybe, just maybe it was nothing more than a humanitarian gesture to a dying man who may have been the murderer of so many, if the latter then at least there are candles of hope left in the gathering dark after all.

You kill me, my relatives kill you, everyone hates everyone until the end of time.  A good thing that mentality's been working so well for the middle-east.

If we're supposed to be so much better, why is it so easy to stoop so low?

Saturday, 15 August 2009

Pumping crazy

"Boss its SP!"

"Crap, what does she want?"

"She's got a truckload of hooker moms carrying placards. One of them's even got one saying 'no to death pumps'."

"No, to what?"

"No to death pumps."

"Don't you mean death camps?"

"No, apparently her pumps are really killing her, and it's all your fault!"

Friday, 14 August 2009

Nu-poo

"Let the poor go to the dogs!"

"Sorry sir, but the dogs have already eaten the poor."

"Well let dogs have the middle classes and once they've finished with them, we can take back their lands. The ones we haven't bankrupted!"

"Sorry sir, but the middle classes are now the new poor."

"Well, what do you want?"

"As all your assets chased the derivatives market - for the high factor return Sir, I'm here to give you to the dogs."

Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Renewable solar pains

Why, with all that’s sane are we told that once more we will be gouged, but as it happens to be aimed towards the wonderful rainbow of reducing greenhouse gases by embracing renewable boundless sources; we’re to accept it – or else!

Tax airline fuel.  That might help levelling out the carbon expenditure playing field; adding that little bit extra to the greenhouse-gases-plant-a-tree-reduction pot.

Subsidise self-generation by having long term (and that's greater than four years for politicians and one year for bankers) plans:

  • so as many buildings as possible have solar panelling, wind, water wheels installed,
  • sensible and meaningful energy conservation measures introduced,
  • improve the efficiency of industry, manufacturing and products produced,
  • retrofit older buildings to be more energy efficient beyond the silly mantra of “loft installation” and “fill those cavity walls” which have been treading the boards for more than 30 years. 

All those billions made by energy companies could instead be used by politicians to ensure their constituents (all of them) have life's which are contentedly happy, enjoyably fulfilled and fulsomely long.  Although after experiencing ‘hi-jinks’ on the way home from a good cinematic experience - but they’re poor kids so relabelled ‘ferals’, some would probably call for life shortening not extending.

Instead of spending trillions on armaments, governments could spend trillions on radically improving the education, the health, the well-being of their citizens.  Ensuring "everyone" is fed, educated, and housed; there'd be no need to see people on street corners homeless.  But that, no doubt, to the many unadulterated believers out there could be deemed to be the most cardinal of sins - socialism!  Gasp, horror, shock.  Where is that soft spot waiting to catch me should I fall!  Well if that's so, so be it.  Because unfettered capitalism's gotten us precisely where exactly? 

But it's neither socialism nor communism because they too have proven to be busted flushes – those leading the charge strangely having a remarkably materially contented lives whilst the many governed queued for hours for  loafs of mouldy bread, wizened carrots and if it happened to be their lucky day a slightly moist dried prune.  All 'isms' have proved wanting, as all ‘isms’ failed.

Now that little rant’s over, back to solar pains.

We should be well beyond that.  Most major cities - within seven years - should be able to produce as much energy as they consume, if it’s done correctly they could even be net exporters of energy.  30%+ food sufficiency - that'd help with jobs, cut down debt and make people feel more communal without the need to emigrate or immigrate.  Already companies around the world, have developed or close to independently developing thin film solar modules and constantly improving on the 10% conversion factor; which although poor is, considering the short time in production still quite a feat, which can only get better especially with current prices 30% cheaper than ordinary models in the wild.

After briefly hearing, whilst in the dozing position, about companies banding together to build solar power plants in the sahara which would provide all the power europe needed, my first thought was “what's taken you so long?”  My second was, “oh really?”  Then before i realised it, a timeline popped up.

solar-sahara

Not long after a couple more thoughts drifted before finally deciding to coalesce.  This then set me wondering how the spatial availability of flat-roofs would look like over London.  So with the aid of google earth, and bits of shady green, a few ideas for further imagery dumped themselves into my cell.

Were to start?  How much space?  I quickly decided on a patch of london roof not to far away, drew a border with yellow lines & red squares and used that as my base roof. 

The measurement for that particular patch (not forgetting this is done using a satellite imagery, dodgy mouse and googles earth measurement tool) came out to 103.9 meters, which - with some bad basic mathematics – gives a potential coverable area of around 860m². 

I’m estimating 18 flats for this particular block.  Namely three floors, each comprising of six flats.  

0231

(map images courtesy of google earth)

So far, not to bad. 

Before zooming out (and i’m sure that some clever person will write an algorithm that works out - in an instant, those areas which are flat or south-facing slanted roofs and not roads, nor parks, nor oceans, and create layers in either google or bing)  we can see how many flat roofs are in the image by giving them a slight green tint, like…

 0231gn 

(map images courtesy of google earth, fizzy green bits me)

Which brings the flat surface area of the roofs of a small number of properties to a little over 3,472.5m².  If that 3,472m² was covered with panels of only 10% efficiency, it would provide about 138.88 kW/hr.  My average daily usage per month (with washing machine, dishwasher, fridge, computer etc.,) is  4.6321 kW/day.  Which means, that taking a potentially totally sunny blue-skied six hour period that the installation would be chugging away for, could provide 833.28 kW.  Or, using my usage as a benchmark, the installation could sluice through enough power to juice 180 flats, let alone the miserly 72 which are indicated in the picture above.  If, my sums are correct.

Things look even more amazing at a height of 488m,

0488-gn

(map images courtesy of google earth, fizzy green bits me)

at 805m,

0805-gn 

(map images courtesy of google earth, fizzy green bits me)

at 1.63km,

1630-gn

(map images courtesy of google earth, fizzy green bits me)

and look at all those empty flat roofs, doing empty flat nothings, not even including slanted roofs with south facing exposures.  Just imagine whether its water or electricity how much could be saved.  But no, lets build really out of the way huge windmills at the cost of billions and not really bother about the estate immediately usable on our doorstep – well rooftops.

Then at 3.23km,

3230-gn

(map images courtesy of google earth, fizzy green bits me)

Finally way up and out there at the dizzying distance of 71.360km (or from here to calais), the little red dot is all that remains of those roof tops in the expanse that is greater london. 

Just imagine how much energy could be generated and how much money saved by residents and businesses alike, if a 10th of those roofs had some sort of solar, wind  or - if over westminster - hot air capture!

71360

(map images courtesy of google earth, green bits me)

Chestnuts

On a slightly different note, mid-july has now louched past, and all seven horse-chestnut saplings are still growing and growing strongly.  

DSC00602l

With a couple hopefully headed for open prairies over the next few weeks, all that’s now required is to divide and replant the remainder into individual pots; some gift wrapping and the perfect instant environmental present that provides years of conkers or roasted fun is only four short months away, unless the blight finally gets them.

Pak Choi

DSC00594s

The pak choi sliced top I saved and stuffed into water then soil, has brightly flowered (or bolted), and will hopefully produce some seeds since i undertook bee duty using a cocktail stick; and increase my self-sufficiency levels to a full 0.01% approx.  Sadly the thyme twig (which can just be seen on the far left) seems to have mimicked the bonsai, turning into a dead dried twig, which will see the bin in a couple of weeks  if its still minus growth shoots.

Monday, 20 July 2009

Mood?

For those who find themselves in particular situations seemingly stuck, unable to put one step forward without retracting ten, it doesn’t last forever; nothing lasts forever!

So when this morning i found myself in an exceptionally foul mood, my thoughts alighted on a greg bear character from songs of earth & power - a damned good read. The one who sloughs off the nastiness bubbling through his being, onto as many of those susceptible all around him. This (with another missive waiting to fling itself from the wings) strangely lifted my sourness, leaving me in a slightly better mood after I whipped off a couple of emails in complaint.

Obviously, after three years living in an an area that has become disagreeable, its time to spread wings and soar to pastures that are new, relaxing, recuperative, relished by the conscience replacing dud batteries recharging the soul.

update 14:04 — perhaps a dose of hrt & laser precision probing might affect a similar rebalancing?

Friday, 3 July 2009

Another age

"Confess."

"Never."

"Confess!"

"You'll have to pull my eyes out first!"

"Eye puller.  Where is that dammed eye-puller!"

"I am here, your great-superfluousness," the eye puller breathes, slithering from the shadows and causing both men in the cell to jump.  "How can I help?"

"Don't pull my eyes out, I confess," the prisoner screams, shying away from the horror sliding into his field of vision, confronting all he held holy.  "I confess!"

Thursday, 2 July 2009

EDF energy: witless in the wind

It's wonderful having friends in differing economic strata's, cultures, faiths… walks of life; as there’s a sundry of differing obsessions, afflictions, things strange and quirky that affects them (and so many others) that I can’t help, rofl (rolling on the(it used to be rotfl but the ‘ttends to be silent in its abbreviated form and not mentioned, except by tits) floor laughing).

From one who's idea of happiness is to be up at 6am and finish working around 9pm, to another who is unable to jam a giant foot anywhere, without it first passing – and usually at speed, through his mouth.

So it was interesting listening to the travails of one of them, whose current energy supplier - edf (one of so many megalothipsaurs), was transferring them from a pre-payment “isn’t that going down faster than it should” meter, to a normal everyday happily whirring away to itself unit, the next.

Easy!

The dawning age of computerisation promised paperless offices and a life of complex free ease! If they’d truly ever realised how things would have turned out, I wonder if they’d have smashed those initial transistors and chased the scientists out of town.

Every mechanic/engineer or, in todays five second buzz-wind, ‘customer presentable problem solver’; seems to be umbilically attached to a small electronic recorder come note-taker, especially when working for one of the aforementioned megas. This wonderful little device makes everything easy and straightforward. Ensuring every job is efficiently undertaken with laser smooth precision. Calls with queries to the mothership are made before, during and after installation. But in this current reality it firmly falls into the arena of comic cock-ups, and descends through the human half of the cybernetically twisted union into an epic fail.

But back to them.

Wishing to keep on top of things, they’ve gone down the path of automatically doing weekly readings, which are spreadsheet’d on and offline. So when they received a card requesting meter readings, it was with unbridled joy that they filled them in. Called. Only to find out that according to the computer, and rude representative, they apparently owed £500.

They assured the representative there must be some error, and that couldn't be the case. The representative assured them that was the case, as that is what computer said.

Not sure why but, images of little britain

A potential representative in training?
sprang through my mind as the growing stream of harrumphing continued from both ends.

Oh yes it does… Oh no it doesn’t…

But then, apparently, friends’ phone packed up and they had to reconnect. This time to a different representative. Who put them on hold.

Moments later the new representative was back on. Apparently, representative one had eventually gotten through and found out there was no debt.

I took a sip of tea.

“A what gesture,” my friend asked surprised. “Oh right, a goodwill gesture. You’ll credit my account, with one pound!”

Bubbling tea sputtered into my saucer. After which, despite my best efforts not to, I had to burst out laughing.

Well it's always nice to know what a big megalothipsaur thinks of its charges, when they have to admit to a right royal cock-up their end; and hence avoid.

Will friends’ change supplier?

Apparently, ohhhh yesssss!

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Transformabambi

Listening to some of the nonsense spouted by some of those who have watched Transformers 2, you'd think they were expecting to see something else. 

For those who don't remember the premise of  the Transformer cartoon series (and please feel free to correct me), if memory serves me correct its about;
a) a bunch of good robots, trying to defend/protect something/one from,
b) a bunch of bad nasty minded robots intent on domination.

Which - regardless how you skitter it, doesn’t really get beyond the series staple whilst faithfully hoisting aloft its spirit;  a staple encompassing (c) bad robots trying to take something over, destroy something and (d) good robots trying to stop them.  This invariably ended up in things been blown up and destroyed, seemingly with gleeful meaningless at regular and frequent intervals.

If they expected to see Transformabambi, or something really deep and meaningful, as I mentioned before, its (a) about a bunch of robots...

Monday, 29 June 2009

Tubby gnats

In a few months time many will and some wont be giving a hearty welcome to the new look tubbytory bench. Yes with as much experience as a newly formed winkytinky grasping after that bar of pure gold, you know they'll have rights and liberties at the forefront of their collective minds.

After they've checked the gold price, stock price and 2nd flipping house price. Laughing all the way with their newly found ex-new-labour-trough friends, and grategull fawning swanking city execs, to collect on their winnings from the accounts of sold-on-the-cheap high street casinos.

Aren't we back to burning bankers yet for plunging a few hundred million (global here) into the disquietude lap of impecunious?

Oh well, whilst we're at it, we might as well welcome in the age of the gnat.

Saturday, 27 June 2009

At last

At last, it’s been a while since i was actually there at the right time with a camera in hand; but this time, the camera was a couple of feet away when my eyes caught a sudden movement, an arrest?

Yes a possible arrest, with the guy appearing to be immobilised and one of the officers checking his hands every now and then.  But then another car appeared soon after this photo was taken with four other officers, a total of eight for one guy who hadn’t even twitched in the minutes i was looking.

1815

Obviously all was well as soon after the newly arrived departed, but not before some kids just - out of nappies, gave the departing officers some sort of grief.  Birching’s too good for them.  But, strange how my mood soon started to lift, I just need a nearby lighting strike from the gathering darkening clouds, then i’ll be really happy.

The seven horse-chestnuts are thriving, apart from one which might soon be sucking on ethereal sap over the next couple of weeks.

nuts1  nuts2

And, although i’m hoping that its just in hibernation – even though it’s summer, the bonsai lost its last leaf and is looking a bit sparse.

deadsai

And then, blow me down, the weeing of screeching sirens brought me careering back for this final snap…

1828

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Wet my drawers and hope for a re-run

After earlier seeing trek and sufficiently wetting myself with enjoyment, the next few flickers of scifans i’m looking forward to encompasses: harry potter, 2012 – clippy below, gi-joe, and that thing – scrubbers - with brucie in – scanners – that I can’t remember surrogates, which looks exceptionally good in an ai meets i-robot with with a twisting nod to a smithless ‘trix. 

So a fun filled cinemascopic 2nd half of 2009 is on order; filled with bumper dvd/blu-ray/next-tantalising-whoppingly-huge-storage-media winter and spring (northern hemisphere) viewing sensation’s.

 

Sunday, 21 June 2009

Democracy’s run

“Woofinate. Woofinate. Woofinate,” barks a strange roboticised voice hidden away from the prying eyes of the public.

“What’s happening, what’s going on,” asks the suitably breathless shadowy figure, just arriving and settling down within the lurking boundary.

“Oh it’s nothing,” comes the reply from the light. “Just the supreme one spinning and chasing own tail, whilst barking at the moon again.”

“Woofinate,” continues to drift in from the distance.

“Here democracy,” someone calls.  “Here boy.”

And the two burst out sniggering.

Saturday, 20 June 2009

Ed's a changing

Test this, test that, six tries or your out.

Change this test date.

Bring in an inept marking organisation.

Try another testing scheme, ditch that.

Suggest consultations for a different testing scheme, ditch that if governors grow a spine.

Pop over for a quick visit to the leader of the free world, get notes on how well there comprehensive-equivalents are doing.  Mental note of the metal detector company...

Prudence this, saviour of the free world that..., I couldn't take it any more. Had to kill him, for the benefit of everyone!”

“Don't worry Alistair,” V hisses. “Just sign this, everything will be okay.”

Thursday, 11 June 2009

A few strays

A few photos slipped past my naming conventions. 

Still working out whether they’re bits of a lung, egg carton box, or just some old dust.

bounty2 bounty1

Wednesday, 10 June 2009

Quitting smoking II

Today is the beginning of the third month i have refrained from jumping back onto the smoking bandwagon, and a few weeks since I allowed a friend to smoke, in the flat, and didn't jump him in an attempt to pry his cigarette from his dead and mortifying grasping hands.

I feel i have made progress. 

Previous periodic attempts at stopping (not including those induced by the assistance of flu), somewhat failed when the slightest whiff would galvanise me into a frenzy, and scurrying for the nearest shop.  Now, nothing!  Things are so good (or bad)  my local newsagents taken on the roll of my own personal pusher.  Telling me (jokingly before anyone gets upset) how wonderful the cancer sticks are, and are you sure you don't need a pack?

The increasing greyness started to give me slight pause for concern, as it refused to go away.  But now that seems to have crashed into a plateau, and the itch for a full body transplant or at least donating myself for full body skin graft experimentation has passed.

Even more progress.

The other thing, which has not only hit a plateau but started a full retreat, was the need to constantly stuff my face during every waking moment; and the odd dream which, if i've correctly remembered, also included stuffing.

Progress.

Taking a look at my previous little table... oh, have months to go before the next momentous gp visit check.

Time

The theory

The actual

3 – 9 months

Coughing and wheezing declines.

Shall wait and see.

initially no - 6 mths to go

1 year

Risk of heart attack reduces by half compared to that of a smoker.

As above.

tbc

10 years

Risk of lung cancer falls to about half that of a smoker.

As before.

tbc

15 years

Risk of coronary heart disease is the same as a non-smoker.

Aren't I dead or uploaded yet!

tbc

Even aol/carphone warehouse have come up trumps, reduced my monthly subscription (obviously to retain a good customer) and sent a lovely shiny new router from which i promptly removed the wireless aerial and disabled the wireless connection.  Sorry but living on a main road with cars/lorries/coaches driving or parking less that 9ft away for hours on end, current wireless security just doesn't hack it.

And in the interest of keeping data flow going, here's a bit about me...

 A bit about me, up close and personal

Tuesday, 9 June 2009

Luckless

This sniffive is nothing concerning elections nor climate, in fact it’s replete purview solely rests with the sole about an iron, that i purchased from argos yesterday in an attempt to shuffle off the disreputable look and look slightly less street or ghetto, or as friends say, the bum look and walk around with a few less cresses peppering my carcass.

In the event i plumped for…

Argos Value Range ETA-21C Steam Iron 410 1572

a bog standard iron, to take out of its dusty corner once a month (or less) to do its job.

What i ended up with however was an iron that you poured the water in, tipped the iron up and the water poured out the bottom right hole of the soleplate onto all over the shirt i was de-creasing, turned the ironing board (whatever happened to xtreme ironing?), into paddling pool and what should have taken two minutes ended up taking 24 minutes and soon after the object packed and ready for shipping back.

Maybe it’s me, maybe my luck’s upped and deserted, or maybe something’s telling me stop been a cheapskate and stop shopping in that rubbish store.

The list so far:

  1. Glass top - chipped on delivery, and a palaver to get replaced.
  2. Gas assisted chair – broken after six months.
  3. Irrigating iron.

but on the opposite part of the equation; a kettle and toaster purchased five years ago, are still in fine working order.

Wonder what’s changed? Ah yes, my luck.

Monday, 8 June 2009

Good riddance?

Sadly yes monsieur purnell, i finger that label your way.

In this, the day of super-power like computing capabilities, the fact his old service is still unable to provide a honed and targeted individual package for someone to effectively get back into employment, is an indictment of the failure of his tenure in that post.

It’s surely not restricted to the realms of rocket science or polymaths to work out what needs to be done.  Or maybe it is, and i'm simply barking at a reflection of myself looking at the moon.  

Provide targeted training/courses to the growing ranks of the unemployed and not the mickey-mouse/happy-meal type schemes they're so fond of trotting out just to have a good sound bite come question time.

But that requires, oh, thinking!  Thinking of actually improving the lot of other people and not just trying to ensure their own tarnished pots of lucre are full to overflowing.

Over a quick couple of minutes even i popped up with this scatty list.

  1. What do people want to do?
  2. What jobs are available on the market?
  3. Are business willing to allow people who are on decent courses the time to work, learn & train?
  4. Will there be a decent level of payment (for employee/trainer and employer alike) or will it just turn into viewing a revolting new dole face every 6 months?
  5. At the end will the claimant gain that bit of essential paper, will they have the possibility of improving their skills, get into work, or simply thrown back on the pile?

New technology, new industries are growing whilst the vast majority of growing unemployed are missing out on the benefits these potential avenues could foster, as the country itself loses out, and all whilst the ferrets continue to fight amongst themselves.

It's time the country stopped relying on esoteric services and outsourcing its soul, to once more have another science/industrial renaissance capable of producing tangible decent goods that people can actually use, that has function, reduces our energy hostage value, cuts down our dependence on energy companies; and heaven forbid helps (however belatedly) our environment and makes people net exporters to the nation. 

So as the start of this rabid uttering of pitiful rubbish says. Good riddance!

Sunday, 7 June 2009

Resulting eu

The initial eu results are in, and apart from the dinosaur parties....  initial results indicate that people are more concerned about immigrants than the future of the planet.

Oh well.

Go humanity!

Friday, 5 June 2009

Faith & culture

When faith and culture stomps on human rights (and no not the right of a murderer to be released to murder again - that's just a nonsense argument) then faith & culture are no longer useful.

Wednesday, 3 June 2009

Drinking binge

Not long after the 24 hour drinking laws came into effect into the UK and long before the ban on drinking on public transport started, i stopped working nights. 

Working nights at the start of a weekend (beginning on a thursday) wasn’t fun, unless you were in a similar state to the drunks just kicked out of the nearest pub and making their way to a club.  Booze, well the smell of booze – whether from a can or regurgitated, packed the bloody-window-wont-open roasting cans as they filled up heaving from stop to stop.

That was the start. 

At the end of my working week, it would be 8am in the morning, and i’d been at it for 10 hours.   On the trip back there was nothing nicer and sweeter than taking out a can and watching those disgusted looks sweeping you up down, or a refined wrinkling of the nose from those still groggy from an early awakening.   Then the cogs would turn.

it’s 8am and he’s drinking!

Must be a wino!  Before our dear amy was even out of nappies. 

Tramp.

Dole scum.  Or just scum.

When it was nothing more harmful than relaxing after a hard nights work and enjoying a nice refreshing drink, so by time I reached home all that was left was a quick shower before slow unwinding and bed.

Monday, 1 June 2009

Sharing the pain

In secretive corners of the film, music, software, television industries around the globe; executives and their leaches - sorry lawyers, have finally come up with the perfect way of getting intellectual copyrights extended to not 150 years, but to infinity. 

The dinosaurs won't be happy until every last file sharer is incarcerated 'til the end of time.  And so with their mouths to whispering silky words into the ears of lawmakers they vilify the crooks, criminals, thieves and miscreants; without whom finances of their hallowed companies would be "immeasurably off the scale"!

Most other industries actually call the vast majority of those people customers, but who's quibbling. 

Yes, they've finally realised that if it's good for religions, con-artists, and politicians, it's also good for them.  Just keep banging out the same nonsensical message and eventually people will start to believe there must be something to it, and come around to their way of thinking.

Sadly, in today's interconnected, news in a nanosecond world, a growing number of people have realised what a crock of overpriced crap they've been peddled, and whilst a few of the artists get to share in the good times the majority don't, as money's dolled & drained way before it's spread too thin.  Leaving the disgusted masses to revolve with their feet or at least siphon with their mice.

Friday, 22 May 2009

Blousey blues

Not sure why, but today's found me in foul humours, the sort where you could readily rip the head from some offending person, tear out their spine, drink their blood and throw away the lifeless skin bag without a care in the world. 

Yes, not a good start to the morning!

Probably brought on by having my sleep half broken by remonstrating people.

After having a black coffee - no cigs, and then hearing a pimped up noise mobile screeching along and past the window, my thoughts turned to wondering whether double civic-loyalty points for lobbing a grenade through their open window, or laser/saser/tasering their brains out just before the car explodes or wondering just how far it would need to plummet before the sudden deceleration forced the stuff the law none seat-belt wearer to explode through the - hopefully, reinforced window screen; would ever be given!

Yes a very bad morning.

Started then stopped listening to the news, as a momentary chink in the event horizon of savagery dared flicker across my seething consciousness.  Oh yes, for a few brief moments i felt at one with major kong.

But as i noticed plants that needed watering, a red haze lifted, and all was once more well with the world.

Thursday, 21 May 2009

Never had it so bad

For the rich and the vast majority of wee poor, food - of what ever standard, is available without the onerous need to till the land, or travel to to far,  avoiding starvation able to fill ones belly.

We can travel, we can obtain medicine, even the generic basics to keep everything going - either paying or free at the point of need.

We're generally un-harassed regardless of our viewpoints, unless we point, jab and spit in our opponents eye, and despite the uk been the most surveillanced country in the world.

So pig snufflers have been caught.  Which one of us over the many years have truly believed that particular nest of vipers didn't contain any?  If the media were to begin considering what other public bodies or private companies (especially the heads of), get up to with their bonus', expenses, jaunts and yachts, they'd be printing expense details from now until the end of time.

With so many of the old snuffling guard not standing at the next election, there'll be a heck of a lot of new unknowns, whose agendas, affiliations and secret children won't really get the fully drilled tabloid treatment many of them might deserve; indeed many will slip through into battlefield ranks unskinned.  With a high probability landslide around the corner, I wonder what other freedoms we'll suddenly have to start fighting for all over again.

A perfect country?  No, far from it. But compared to quite a few others around the globe, it really aint to bad.

Wednesday, 20 May 2009

Eat thyself future boy

My initial thoughts upon seeing the super-soldier of the future (2030) skirted the flippant nonsensical - bit like this particular post, to wondering why they were wasting so much money, time and unnecessary duplication; when a flash of perspiration dribbled down my chin.

Images and photo courtesy of newscientist  usarmy although for some strange reason the photo image from the usarmy only popped up after been accessed via google, and not direct - so had to do a bit of shopping... eek!

mg20227094.000-3_750  army.mil-26425-2008-12-03-081215s 

Someone had solved all those particular problems (if in a slightly less hi-tech way) thousands of years ago. Just point a stick and say your cause is just and true.  Voilà! Before you know it a crusade or jihad.  Problem solved. Instant, thoughtless (apart from what you tell them to think), fighting machines.

Doped up - so as not to think.  Shocked - to know when to think. But they forgot to include the micro-bacterial food implants which would provide months of nourishment at a time.  The little critters will be taking all the energy they'd need from available light, the soldiers recyclables (yes in keeping with the tone of a previous post, what i meant to say is; shit, piss) and moisture from the air. 

Oh yes, nothing nicer than nourishing yourself.

Perhaps it's me but i'm thinking, just change the colour slightly...   and...

superfutureboy

its a starship trooper.

Tale of two stories

So here are two different takes on the same breaking story, from two organisations that are not really known for their barking at the moon mentality! 

The guardian

guardian1

The bbc

bbc1

And the paper that's been breaking on the trough snufflers over the past few days?

The telegraph

telgraph1

So as with all things that fly across the; ether, net, air, papyrus or other, not only needs a pinch of salt, but very own personal quarry.

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

Tits above

Warning! Content contains rude words - eek!

I've never really understood why it's fine to watch dismemberment, or send people abroad in our name to die, or allow the continued construction and research into ever more horrific weapons; yet we get all up-tight when it comes down to sex or bodily functions? 

What a fucked up, twisted around, arse above tit global society we've become.

I mean, when people pick their nose they say they're picking their nose, and not excuse me whilst i re-align my mucous membranes; although the way things are going, even that might be taken the wrong way.

Instead of saying i've just had a colon cleanse, what's wrong with saying i've just had my arse cleaned!  Obviously something financial institutions and political parties forgot to include in their respective recruitment clauses.

How big do your nuts grow?

Yes summers ongoing march is slowly fritzing the last few cells of responsibility and it's nearly time to get ready for those paunches over belts, wobbly knees and smelly public transport links that makes you wish for the return of nosegays.

But in the meantime the nuts i'd planted, that finally poked their heads above soil and looked like...

From small nuts ... at the start of april.

Now, nearing the end of may, all seven are still growing and are looking more like ...

mygrowingconkers1

... and I think six will soon be in need of new homes.

Monday, 18 May 2009

Now we wait

The LTTE have been defeated.

How will the Tamil minority now be treated? 

If the Sri Lankan majority treat them with respect - despite the past two decades war and numerous horrors, they will as a people have taken a major step forward. 

Time.

Tuesday, 12 May 2009

Online tents

Good to see that the empire is getting its thoughts around to making a few more millions.

So we have a paper - let's say the Times, about 70 pages with 50 pages of adverts, cost 85p?  So average article's about 1/3 a page so that'll give us a grand total per article of £0.01p per article.

At a cost of a penny per article, I might just be tempted to pop down to my local library and read it there, if i must. But i'm sure there'll be countries around the world more than happy to provide a feed.  Either that or some smart alec will twitter the best bits.

And like tents in a gale, there goes another one...

Friday, 8 May 2009

A paucity of pygmies

The government's been more than happy to bail out banks to the tune of $2.26*tn, yet they have thousands of people on the streets who are homeless.

Imagine if they took 1 percent of that whopping £1.5tn.  They could, at let's say £80k per new built flat (bit more expensive for a house), build at least 187,000 new flats. 

But that would hit the housing market, and people would lose money they've sunk into treating housing as just another commodity.  But there'd be no homelessness!  Everyone, or at least nearly everyone in the country, would finally have a roof over their heads.  It'd be cheaper than constantly having soul destroying meeting after soul destroying meeting carping on that there's just not enough housing, what are we to do. 

Who know's whole new towns with new infrastructure, new jobs (the new tech's) could be created, and with the mistakes learned from the disasters of the past, perhaps they could be avoided this time around.

Imagine 187,000 new flats, with the fastest easily upgraded broadband service, excellent public transport links, excellent community facilities, excellent green spaces, the latest environmentally efficient technologies, recycling, solar heating, solar powering, if done properly these could be feeding electricity back into the grind, and for how the old pollution ridden cities could be.

But as vision is the one thing seemingly lacking in today's uk, it'll probably only happen when things really freeze over.

Oh yes, how much would 187k homes contribute towards council tax payments alone per year?  £172mn.

* $/£ rate of 1.5069 as at 13:15 8th May 2009

Saturday, 2 May 2009

Glorious

Last nights glorious sunset just had to be snapped.  And like Douglas Adams' fabulous sheep, every sunset's a new day.

2nitsskle

Friday, 1 May 2009

Chesties

No, nothing to do with spare pork ribs, fried avian wings or bbq'd legs.  But, there is a lovely picture of bubbling beans.

Horse chesty seedlets, 30th April 2009

DSCF2152

Bubbling beans

beans

An extra, stray

spid1

Thursday, 30 April 2009

In to the out

It's always funny listening to the arguments been used to keep the 48 hour opt out, and keeping it going come hell or high water.  

At one stroke - whilst blaming it on those lazy arsed european politicians - you could ensure that no one in the country has to work more than 48 hours per week.  

What better way of ensuring wealth, equality and increasingly scarce work is distributed amongst those who have been left out in the current cold clime.  I doubt - but naturally I could be wrong, whether it's the vast majority of employees scrambling to hoist the repel-all-borders-flag up a flag post, or going 'of course I want to work a 100 hours a week, I really really really love my job.' 

Those who enjoy ticking off the hours are usually the ones whose pension pots makes the income of a small city visibly pale in comparison.  Whose main thoughts lay on the side of accruing huge wealth simply for the sake of it. 

But spare a thought for those whose working hours miraculously merge into unpaid overtime hours, who believe they have no choice, and no option.  If they're lucky, they'll have seen that innocuous bit of paper hinting at the concept of loyal paternalism; of course you want to work more than 48 hours to make this the worlds greatest and successful company, don't you?

Indicating that you wish to keep your legal opt-in, immediately marks you out as a glass-ceilinged shirker.

But in the meantime they really should drop the name Working Time Limits and give it its proper title; let's work the buggers till they drop.

empspfdm

Now then, who mentioned flu sniffing?

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

Washing hands?

With the not yet pandemic scale of what's turning out to be an interesting outbreak of flu, It's a bit disturbing that people have to be told; don't sneeze on someone, and wash your hands.  Eew, eew, EEW!

Perhaps they should start teaching the basics in schools and religious institutions, before even bothering to wonder where the flu came from, how it evolved, unless of course its been created by some intelligent designer with a great big designer laboratory behind him or her.

Ban it

Ban everything, as we've finally discovered that everything - in one way or another - is bad for us.  We should, on that fact alone, ban everything!

Ban going outside.  As thunderous hailstones or lightning or a falling plane might put an end to a life.

Ban cars, and not only from the obvious the amount of pollution they exude, but for the cars habit of bursting into flames, careering into drivers, pedestrians, bollards and eventually ending up as scrap in a river somewhere poisoning a food source.

Ban watching tv.  As too much tv watching rots the brain and has it oozing out and down the dead persons double chin.

Ban food, due to its toxicity and the fact people only end up stuffing their face, and taking up more than one seat in economy.

Ban flying, just in case a toilet comes hurtling out the sky.

Ban anyone who wants to ban anything.

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

Parachutes ahoy

So those who are earning more than £150,000 are boo-hoo-ing that they'll have to pay an extra £2,900 per year, in tax.   Are they aware that that £2,900 they are paying is the equivalent of 87% just over two million people have to live on? 

So will the new 50% tax rate produce the threatened mass exodus of talent from the city of london?  Hopefully.  Just feel sorry for the next city the talent decide to land on and improve.

The real beneficiaries from this budget are the under 25's and those isa savers who are, or will be 50 by the time october 2009 comes around, and can take advantage of the higher saving levels. 

Oh yes and those who buy the gilts and bonds to pay for it.

22-04-09

earth-sos

 

for more

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Prick that nutty bubble

As bubbles come and go, it's surely time for the fundamental bubble to be pricked before it pops and takes half the world with it. 

Did anyone really expect pres. mahmoud ahmadinejad to do or say anything else?  I'm sure he's one of the escaped spitting image puppets that's had some life breathed into it and and is running amok, wrecking revenge.  And then we have the unfolding debacle in pakistan, give us what we want and we'll think about giving up arms... ha, no we won't.  If they (fundis) believe those of their same delusional belief system who have no truck and wish to have no truck with their delusions should be eradicated, as well as those who believe in a different version of the same delusion should be eradicated; how did the authorities ever believe they could agree anything that didn't, at some stage, involve that time honoured tradition of having fingers crossed behind your backs.

Onto happier and more lighter moments.  The horse chestnuts are doing remarkably well.

Let's have a quick recap of the timeline so far...

2nd april 2009
12th april
020409 120409

... and now how they look today.

21st april 2009
DSCF2139 DSCF2140

Friday, 17 April 2009

Nails

"At what stage will you wake up to realise you no longer have any freedom?

Perhaps you never will, as you no longer know, what freedom is."

Wednesday, 15 April 2009

Ambassadorial duties

I wouldn't know a past participle from a split infinitive if it hit me over the head with a pa... damn, used that one already.

But moving on to other pointless things, its a bit of a slap in the face when your nominees are rebuffed by the representative of the word.  Perhaps pres o. is looking at it in the wrong way.  As the pontiff obviously only wishes to be surrounded by nodding ducks, then perhaps he (obama) should just send a sack-full of them.  Which should be more than sufficient for the amount of sense which would be exchanged anyway.

Oh yes, forgot to show my support in the previous poke at religious nuttery.

SupportDenmark2EN

Well better 3 ¾ years late to show some free speech solidarity than not at all.

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

Colour views

Extremist views on racism strangely coalesce when you reach the edges of the debate. 

Regardless of the the colour of a persons skin, the more extreme their particular view on race (whichever race), the more in common they have with their counterparts.  Sort of a racist code of diametric agreement.  The extremes of the brotherhood feel they are, or have been, or will be the victims.  Both feel to have been oppressed or held back or overlooked by those in power.  Invaded, discriminated against and the interlopers should be kicked out. 

And luckily, the web allows us all to be on our guard.  To say no.  Things can be different. 

Monday, 13 April 2009

Three cheers?

The problem with waking up and starting to early...

“I have to kill the children and my wife and send them to heaven. I don’t care about killing myself and going to hell.”

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/13/nyregion/13shoot.html?ref=nyregion

and in another part of the globe...

"Shop warned for selling offensive shoes

The customer protection section (cps) recently seized shoes with the name of god printed on them.

The department announced that the shop was selling shoes in direct violation of rules and regulations and could not be tolerated. The acting head of the cps, said that the department's inspectors acted swiftly following a report from one of the customers [read busy body, curtain twitcher, righteous angry, or another shop owner getting rid of the competition].

The department investigated the report on the spot and concluded the complaint was genuine, and inspectors acted immediately.

Inspectors raided and seized huge quantities of shoes and summoned the shop owner to the the Department. He was ordered to sign a pledge never to import that type of shoes in future and the shop was issued an official warning, a copy of which was kept in the shop's file.

The shop was penalised as per article no. 10 of the penalty scheme, which stipulates that those who circulate products that directly harm islamic laws and the decency code, are penalised.

This was not the first time, the department's inspectors had seized shoes with the name of god printed on them, in a way which badly harms muslim feelings.

She called on the public to be extremely careful when they make purchases in the emirate and to contact the department in case of any possible doubts."

http://archive.gulfnews.com/nation/General/10303246.html

and elsewhere, but a different time...

"They tell me to burn in hell and good riddance,"

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7853325.stm

 

Reviewers noose

A reviewer (freelance mind) of Origins:Wolverine gets the chop by pasting a review, in which he also mentions, he'd seen it via the web. 

The actions of his erstwhile employer, fox, is to sack him.  The same fox which is now related to the old big daddy of usa news journalism, the new york times; yes incest's on the menu.  They and the film co's seem to have lathered an amount of free pre-fervour advertising for the film that, if otherwise conducted via usual channels, have added a good few extra zeros on top of an already large budget.  Maybe it's all part of the overall plan and he'll be back working for them in no time at all, or maybe he thought it would slip by unnoticed, especially with most of the industry snarling away in sweden barring - if only half - charges at the pirate bay.

But it jogged a memory. And I recalled the last time this occurred, admittedly only stargate sg1's final days - with way less budgetary requirements to claw back than origins will require.  But it was strange how and with it not happening before, the final two episodes (minus vfx or full sound fx) managed to escape carefully vetted security clutches and ping themselves online.  Surprisingly, the extra publicity pulled in more people than the studios expected, and - probably - helped to assist with the planned films.  Yes, all very strange.  And strangely to, that particular episode hasn't satisfactorily been solved to this day, well not that i've heard anything about.

So yes, x-men origins:wolverine is available for download via any p2p service - without the vfx.  Which, if it's any good, will wet peoples curious appetite ensuring the seed's successfully planted and ready for the films release.  And people will subconsciously prime themselves to experience the films huge sensation-numbing thx greatness.  After all, as tobacco companies have more or less been indicating publicly for years, "just because it's out there, and plastered on everything, of course people won't be influenced to buy."  If it's any good. 

Content producers will have to climb out of their bunkers and start engaging in a more meaningful way the very people they are supposedly producing the films, the books, music for.  Yes the consumers.  As opposed to just thinking "how much money can we make from the suckers." To engage them when they produce something that's really good, as well as admitting when they've produced a total dogs breakfast and not worth the popcorn squashed onto the cinema floor let alone cinema ticket, and give something back to those who have wasted good money.  But no doubt that would lead to another can of worms with people saying everything they've seen is crap and where's my next freebie!

The days when consumers were nose-led by old media dinosaurs is, hopefully, diminishing. But deep within darkened tunnels (golf courses) a rear guard action continues by those who want nothing more than to get back to the good old days of totally dictating how consumers can use a particular piece of media, then gouge them for as much as possible, all the while bringing out the most mediocre rubbish, minus the odd sparkling gem, as possible.

Silly mistake by roger friedman? Potentially, time will tell. 

Brilliant free advertising for the film?  Way beyond anything the companies probably hoped for. 

Will I see it when it's out?  Damn, should have booked front seat tickets.  x-men