Tuesday, 30 June 2009


Listening to some of the nonsense spouted by some of those who have watched Transformers 2, you'd think they were expecting to see something else. 

For those who don't remember the premise of  the Transformer cartoon series (and please feel free to correct me), if memory serves me correct its about;
a) a bunch of good robots, trying to defend/protect something/one from,
b) a bunch of bad nasty minded robots intent on domination.

Which - regardless how you skitter it, doesn’t really get beyond the series staple whilst faithfully hoisting aloft its spirit;  a staple encompassing (c) bad robots trying to take something over, destroy something and (d) good robots trying to stop them.  This invariably ended up in things been blown up and destroyed, seemingly with gleeful meaningless at regular and frequent intervals.

If they expected to see Transformabambi, or something really deep and meaningful, as I mentioned before, its (a) about a bunch of robots...

Monday, 29 June 2009

Tubby gnats

In a few months time many will and some wont be giving a hearty welcome to the new look tubbytory bench. Yes with as much experience as a newly formed winkytinky grasping after that bar of pure gold, you know they'll have rights and liberties at the forefront of their collective minds.

After they've checked the gold price, stock price and 2nd flipping house price. Laughing all the way with their newly found ex-new-labour-trough friends, and grategull fawning swanking city execs, to collect on their winnings from the accounts of sold-on-the-cheap high street casinos.

Aren't we back to burning bankers yet for plunging a few hundred million (global here) into the disquietude lap of impecunious?

Oh well, whilst we're at it, we might as well welcome in the age of the gnat.

Saturday, 27 June 2009

At last

At last, it’s been a while since i was actually there at the right time with a camera in hand; but this time, the camera was a couple of feet away when my eyes caught a sudden movement, an arrest?

Yes a possible arrest, with the guy appearing to be immobilised and one of the officers checking his hands every now and then.  But then another car appeared soon after this photo was taken with four other officers, a total of eight for one guy who hadn’t even twitched in the minutes i was looking.


Obviously all was well as soon after the newly arrived departed, but not before some kids just - out of nappies, gave the departing officers some sort of grief.  Birching’s too good for them.  But, strange how my mood soon started to lift, I just need a nearby lighting strike from the gathering darkening clouds, then i’ll be really happy.

The seven horse-chestnuts are thriving, apart from one which might soon be sucking on ethereal sap over the next couple of weeks.

nuts1  nuts2

And, although i’m hoping that its just in hibernation – even though it’s summer, the bonsai lost its last leaf and is looking a bit sparse.


And then, blow me down, the weeing of screeching sirens brought me careering back for this final snap…


Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Wet my drawers and hope for a re-run

After earlier seeing trek and sufficiently wetting myself with enjoyment, the next few flickers of scifans i’m looking forward to encompasses: harry potter, 2012 – clippy below, gi-joe, and that thing – scrubbers - with brucie in – scanners – that I can’t remember surrogates, which looks exceptionally good in an ai meets i-robot with with a twisting nod to a smithless ‘trix. 

So a fun filled cinemascopic 2nd half of 2009 is on order; filled with bumper dvd/blu-ray/next-tantalising-whoppingly-huge-storage-media winter and spring (northern hemisphere) viewing sensation’s.


Sunday, 21 June 2009

Democracy’s run

“Woofinate. Woofinate. Woofinate,” barks a strange roboticised voice hidden away from the prying eyes of the public.

“What’s happening, what’s going on,” asks the suitably breathless shadowy figure, just arriving and settling down within the lurking boundary.

“Oh it’s nothing,” comes the reply from the light. “Just the supreme one spinning and chasing own tail, whilst barking at the moon again.”

“Woofinate,” continues to drift in from the distance.

“Here democracy,” someone calls.  “Here boy.”

And the two burst out sniggering.

Saturday, 20 June 2009

Ed's a changing

Test this, test that, six tries or your out.

Change this test date.

Bring in an inept marking organisation.

Try another testing scheme, ditch that.

Suggest consultations for a different testing scheme, ditch that if governors grow a spine.

Pop over for a quick visit to the leader of the free world, get notes on how well there comprehensive-equivalents are doing.  Mental note of the metal detector company...

Prudence this, saviour of the free world that..., I couldn't take it any more. Had to kill him, for the benefit of everyone!”

“Don't worry Alistair,” V hisses. “Just sign this, everything will be okay.”

Thursday, 11 June 2009

A few strays

A few photos slipped past my naming conventions. 

Still working out whether they’re bits of a lung, egg carton box, or just some old dust.

bounty2 bounty1

Wednesday, 10 June 2009

Quitting smoking II

Today is the beginning of the third month i have refrained from jumping back onto the smoking bandwagon, and a few weeks since I allowed a friend to smoke, in the flat, and didn't jump him in an attempt to pry his cigarette from his dead and mortifying grasping hands.

I feel i have made progress. 

Previous periodic attempts at stopping (not including those induced by the assistance of flu), somewhat failed when the slightest whiff would galvanise me into a frenzy, and scurrying for the nearest shop.  Now, nothing!  Things are so good (or bad)  my local newsagents taken on the roll of my own personal pusher.  Telling me (jokingly before anyone gets upset) how wonderful the cancer sticks are, and are you sure you don't need a pack?

The increasing greyness started to give me slight pause for concern, as it refused to go away.  But now that seems to have crashed into a plateau, and the itch for a full body transplant or at least donating myself for full body skin graft experimentation has passed.

Even more progress.

The other thing, which has not only hit a plateau but started a full retreat, was the need to constantly stuff my face during every waking moment; and the odd dream which, if i've correctly remembered, also included stuffing.


Taking a look at my previous little table... oh, have months to go before the next momentous gp visit check.


The theory

The actual

3 – 9 months

Coughing and wheezing declines.

Shall wait and see.

initially no - 6 mths to go

1 year

Risk of heart attack reduces by half compared to that of a smoker.

As above.


10 years

Risk of lung cancer falls to about half that of a smoker.

As before.


15 years

Risk of coronary heart disease is the same as a non-smoker.

Aren't I dead or uploaded yet!


Even aol/carphone warehouse have come up trumps, reduced my monthly subscription (obviously to retain a good customer) and sent a lovely shiny new router from which i promptly removed the wireless aerial and disabled the wireless connection.  Sorry but living on a main road with cars/lorries/coaches driving or parking less that 9ft away for hours on end, current wireless security just doesn't hack it.

And in the interest of keeping data flow going, here's a bit about me...

 A bit about me, up close and personal

Tuesday, 9 June 2009


This sniffive is nothing concerning elections nor climate, in fact it’s replete purview solely rests with the sole about an iron, that i purchased from argos yesterday in an attempt to shuffle off the disreputable look and look slightly less street or ghetto, or as friends say, the bum look and walk around with a few less cresses peppering my carcass.

In the event i plumped for…

Argos Value Range ETA-21C Steam Iron 410 1572

a bog standard iron, to take out of its dusty corner once a month (or less) to do its job.

What i ended up with however was an iron that you poured the water in, tipped the iron up and the water poured out the bottom right hole of the soleplate onto all over the shirt i was de-creasing, turned the ironing board (whatever happened to xtreme ironing?), into paddling pool and what should have taken two minutes ended up taking 24 minutes and soon after the object packed and ready for shipping back.

Maybe it’s me, maybe my luck’s upped and deserted, or maybe something’s telling me stop been a cheapskate and stop shopping in that rubbish store.

The list so far:

  1. Glass top - chipped on delivery, and a palaver to get replaced.
  2. Gas assisted chair – broken after six months.
  3. Irrigating iron.

but on the opposite part of the equation; a kettle and toaster purchased five years ago, are still in fine working order.

Wonder what’s changed? Ah yes, my luck.

Monday, 8 June 2009

Good riddance?

Sadly yes monsieur purnell, i finger that label your way.

In this, the day of super-power like computing capabilities, the fact his old service is still unable to provide a honed and targeted individual package for someone to effectively get back into employment, is an indictment of the failure of his tenure in that post.

It’s surely not restricted to the realms of rocket science or polymaths to work out what needs to be done.  Or maybe it is, and i'm simply barking at a reflection of myself looking at the moon.  

Provide targeted training/courses to the growing ranks of the unemployed and not the mickey-mouse/happy-meal type schemes they're so fond of trotting out just to have a good sound bite come question time.

But that requires, oh, thinking!  Thinking of actually improving the lot of other people and not just trying to ensure their own tarnished pots of lucre are full to overflowing.

Over a quick couple of minutes even i popped up with this scatty list.

  1. What do people want to do?
  2. What jobs are available on the market?
  3. Are business willing to allow people who are on decent courses the time to work, learn & train?
  4. Will there be a decent level of payment (for employee/trainer and employer alike) or will it just turn into viewing a revolting new dole face every 6 months?
  5. At the end will the claimant gain that bit of essential paper, will they have the possibility of improving their skills, get into work, or simply thrown back on the pile?

New technology, new industries are growing whilst the vast majority of growing unemployed are missing out on the benefits these potential avenues could foster, as the country itself loses out, and all whilst the ferrets continue to fight amongst themselves.

It's time the country stopped relying on esoteric services and outsourcing its soul, to once more have another science/industrial renaissance capable of producing tangible decent goods that people can actually use, that has function, reduces our energy hostage value, cuts down our dependence on energy companies; and heaven forbid helps (however belatedly) our environment and makes people net exporters to the nation. 

So as the start of this rabid uttering of pitiful rubbish says. Good riddance!

Sunday, 7 June 2009

Resulting eu

The initial eu results are in, and apart from the dinosaur parties....  initial results indicate that people are more concerned about immigrants than the future of the planet.

Oh well.

Go humanity!

Friday, 5 June 2009

Faith & culture

When faith and culture stomps on human rights (and no not the right of a murderer to be released to murder again - that's just a nonsense argument) then faith & culture are no longer useful.

Wednesday, 3 June 2009

Drinking binge

Not long after the 24 hour drinking laws came into effect into the UK and long before the ban on drinking on public transport started, i stopped working nights. 

Working nights at the start of a weekend (beginning on a thursday) wasn’t fun, unless you were in a similar state to the drunks just kicked out of the nearest pub and making their way to a club.  Booze, well the smell of booze – whether from a can or regurgitated, packed the bloody-window-wont-open roasting cans as they filled up heaving from stop to stop.

That was the start. 

At the end of my working week, it would be 8am in the morning, and i’d been at it for 10 hours.   On the trip back there was nothing nicer and sweeter than taking out a can and watching those disgusted looks sweeping you up down, or a refined wrinkling of the nose from those still groggy from an early awakening.   Then the cogs would turn.

it’s 8am and he’s drinking!

Must be a wino!  Before our dear amy was even out of nappies. 


Dole scum.  Or just scum.

When it was nothing more harmful than relaxing after a hard nights work and enjoying a nice refreshing drink, so by time I reached home all that was left was a quick shower before slow unwinding and bed.

Monday, 1 June 2009

Sharing the pain

In secretive corners of the film, music, software, television industries around the globe; executives and their leaches - sorry lawyers, have finally come up with the perfect way of getting intellectual copyrights extended to not 150 years, but to infinity. 

The dinosaurs won't be happy until every last file sharer is incarcerated 'til the end of time.  And so with their mouths to whispering silky words into the ears of lawmakers they vilify the crooks, criminals, thieves and miscreants; without whom finances of their hallowed companies would be "immeasurably off the scale"!

Most other industries actually call the vast majority of those people customers, but who's quibbling. 

Yes, they've finally realised that if it's good for religions, con-artists, and politicians, it's also good for them.  Just keep banging out the same nonsensical message and eventually people will start to believe there must be something to it, and come around to their way of thinking.

Sadly, in today's interconnected, news in a nanosecond world, a growing number of people have realised what a crock of overpriced crap they've been peddled, and whilst a few of the artists get to share in the good times the majority don't, as money's dolled & drained way before it's spread too thin.  Leaving the disgusted masses to revolve with their feet or at least siphon with their mice.