Sunday, 12 April 2009

Spring colours

Something natural, lighter and strangely hopeful.

Yes i'm growing horse chestnuts, but out of 12 planted only seven have poked heads above soil.

The first pic was taken on the 2nd of April, and the 2nd take a few moments before posting.  At this rate, barring a very bad frost, in a months time the horse chestnut seedlings will have to be given new homes.

Pic 1 2nd April 2009

020409

Pic 2: 12th April 2009

120409

And although the angle of capture's slightly different, in the 1st picture you can just see the second shoot popping up out of the soil on the right hand side, which in the second picture is the one just about to open its leaves, in the lower right hand side.

Ah yes before I forget and get totally carried away, here's the lovely spring climbing rose and yellow something which escapes me.

Pic 3: 2nd April 2009

020409.1

So let it be

For the moments that have gone, and the moments that are.

so_let_it_be

Saturday, 11 April 2009

Flapping through the breeze

Brings a different twist to it.

"It's hard to fathom and digest,

but I digress.

A world-wind flapping through the breeze,

stopping, making us think.

An alien's invaded,

1600 pennsylvania avenue.

Four more years?  An unbearable crutch.

Navigating craters, leaping superbowls of dust,

avoiding the on-rushing surge,

of apocalypses surrounded by armageddons.

But thankfully it's finally happened,

an alien's invaded 1600 pennsylvania avenue.

When that last drop of oil dribbled to a stop,

so, so long ago, and the world descended

into old fashioned mowing,

and killing and dicing, of lands anew.

Peace finally happened, when an alien landed,

and invaded 1600 pennsylvania avenue."

Nothing's ever perfect

So much to do, so little time and a quarter of the year's already slipped into the clutches of history, whoever records that history. 

But at least in the future, if bright sparks ensure the technical information regarding the plethora of codecs are kept, our descendents will be able to enjoy streaming hours of chortling fun wondering how we managed to survive and even more amazed at why we would watch knowing, directly into their cortex.

 

Us


Them

Kettling and the herding of dissenters, as all protesters are potential terrorists/anarchists and "deserve what they get."


The cafetiere's on and they're huddling around after the bust up (well except in metropolitan suburbs after inter-racial riots).

Bosses send out emails or sms's informing employees they're fired. Employees grumble, shout a few words then shuffle off to the dole queue.


Workers receive emails. Proceed to lock bosses in broom cupboards, dust off and put on scratched editions of la terreur blanche.

Police and strikers stand around, barracking, goading each other, exuding nothing but loathing and pure contempt.


Police and strikers barrack and goad each other, then afterwards get down to a good chin-wag, some decent lunch and talk about the shocking state of the world.

Renaissance in the home cooking of cabbage.


Wondering who in their right mind would eat bubble & squeak.

Starting to realise the thatcher & blair years might not have been quite so enjoyable, for the vast majority after all.


Trying to catch up to the thatcher & blair years.

And as the start of another good friday comes to an end, it's good to know that at least the weather is keeping to the wonderful tradition of providing a cold, rain-sodden, miserable bank holiday experience.

Friday, 10 April 2009

Easter

Wishing everyone a contented easter.

AOL contracts

My aol contract is up in two days time and I decided to give them a call to discover what they could offer someone who has been with them for (it transpires after been told) nearly nine years.

Yes, after nearly nine years of faithful dedication as all my peers shot by on the speed stakes and laughed at my paltry 2mb then 6.7mb instead of 8mb, I stuck and remained with them. Even after missing out on the laptop or ps3 offer the last time my contract was up, I remained a faithful and loyal customer.

The past week has been spent champing at the bit, waiting until a couple of days before the end to look around and seeing what else was available before making that call.

Nine long years.

When does loyalty pay off?

Apparently never if you're an aol customer. Even surgery's give you excellent treatment for been loyal nowadays. But not, it seems, aol.

hallelujah!

We talked and I was congratulated at been one of the lucky ones to receive nearly 7mb speeds as many get less than that.

hallelujah!

And we can throw in a free wireless router? I already have two.

hallelujah!

I notice you don't have a bundle, let me do a quick calculation... we can offer you a full package for £25 per month.

That's nice, but that's £5 more expensive than i'm paying now and I have my services with separate providers!

After nearly nine years as a loyal customer, the best they can offer (for me to receive the same service) is a price increase of 25%.

HALLELUJAH!

Thursday, 9 April 2009

Hacking the light fantastic

After all the to-ing and fro-ing, by the us over the gary mckinnon case, it now comes out that most if not all the energy & utility networks are moled through by pesky spies of the commie persuasion!

With the scale of devastation any potential governmental hackers (unofficial or otherwise) might cause, shouldn't the government be bringing the same amount of disproportionate force down to bear on those infiltrating the life blood of the country, as it has and is currently undertaking against gary.   Who, let us not forget, was only looking for proof of ufo's.

Could this be the first salvos in the real life serialisation of Jericho?  Must dig out some popcorn.

The great unlimited debate

Well not really great, and not really a debate.  Perhaps the asa requires an up to date dictionary whilst returning the one they were forced to borrow from ofcom.

Today, well it was a while back - before i had a break, (and lo and behold they've popped along 'n snuck something in for a rescue), the british advertising standards authority (asa) allowed mobile companies to use the word unlimited in their advertising, regardless of the fact that an advert (which sparked the initial complaint) from carphone warehouse's spin-off - e2save; had in microscopic handy small print a clause stating unlimited meant, "data transfer that is limited to 250mb per month".

Now before i popped the word (unlimited) into a couple of online dictionaries, i wandered through the dusty reaches of the vast echoing emptiness that passes for my mind, searching for the accumulating morass of meanings i'd come to understand and associate with the term unlimited.

From everything i dredged up, i could only deduce one over arching meaning.  It meant without cap.  Endless.  Goes on and on and on and ... the antonym of limited.  You know, the full 180-about-faced-slap-reversing-two-sided turn.

The sort of scenario where if fund manager were to say "'i'm going to ensure your income returns are unlimited," you know to keep them talking whilst pressing the fed button.  But back to the definitions...

A quick brief clip from the free dictionary

un·lim·it·ed (n-lm-td) adj.

1. Having no restrictions or controls: an unlimited travel ticket. 2. Having or seeming to have no boundaries; infinite: an unlimited horizon. 3. Without qualification or exception; absolute: unlimited self-confidence.

Even if they'd utilised version number 2, who in their right mind then went on to suggest that 250mb was just peachy?

And just in case i've copypasted the wrong bits, here's another from merriam-webster

1 : lacking any controls : unrestricted <unlimited access> 2 : boundless , infinite <unlimited possibilities> 3 : not bounded by exceptions.

So a term and its meaning, which has more or less been agreed upon since the 15th century, the asa and ofcom have decided (seemingly) to hijack, for the benefit of... the industry.

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

Thoughts

Heartfelt condolences, thoughts and best wishes with the people of L'Aquila.

Sometimes governments are quick and speedy enough to get things done; other times lumbering bureaucracy and face saving get in the way of helping to rebuild.

There are many ways of keeping up to date with the current level of disasters occurring around the globe, and for more than a five minute hand wringing and further information:

Make a difference, get involved.

Pension stakes bilious bile

Would the backlash and floggings so many fervently wish to heap up against the ex-masters of the universe have been so great, had the banks (retail) and bankers not been so adamant about the righteousness and moral certitude of the overdraft fees and interest charges, they said everyone who had the audacity should expect as a penalty for been lax with their money.

On that level, with the way they forecast this historic record breaking run, they should be put in stocks for at least two years and pelted on a regular basis with: turnips, offal, fed the weakest of gruel, and then have all their assets foreclosed on.

Good to see the shareholders of rbs, voting by a whopping 90% to register disapproval, a shame more didn't vote in previous years.  True the talent might have flown to other institutions, but then there still might have been an independent non-merged bank.  And with this sort of talent spotting, i'd rather try my luck winning the national-lottery jackpot prize four times in a row.

So, in the great unemployment banking stakes

poor average-pay sods: 29,999  vs.  really rich trouter: 1
(or put another way,
newly unemployed rbs employee: £3,343.60p pa.  vs.  ex-head-trout:  £702,000 pa.)

But, could the whole financial meltdown have a silver lining?

The very first paragraph of the first page of the executive summary of the ipcc climate change and water says:

"observational  records  and  climate  projections  provide  abundant  evidence  that  freshwater  resources are  vulnerable  and  have  the  potential  to  be  strongly  impacted  by  climate  change,  with  wide-ranging consequences for human societies and ecosystems."

executive summary, ipcc, climate change & water 2008.

With so much freshwater used for industrial/farming use, maybe this will allow us some breathing space to speed up alternative energy creation, improve energy use efficiency, and drastically reduce the waste we lax consumers in so many countries create.

... now where's that picture again ...

Tuesday, 7 April 2009

Quitting smoking?

I've given up smoking. 

Well I say given up.  I am on the cusp of the fifth week without lighting up or having the remotest inclination of inhaling one. 

Do I feel any better?

I've been smoking for the last 24 years.   Ranging anywhere from 10 cigs per day to over a 100 fags when socially stress-pressed.   And then one day, four weeks ago, I stopped.  Stopped without needing the usual cold, flu or other bodily ailment as an excuse to refrain from the mad morning scramble of opening a packet, lighting up and inhaling along with my first coffee of the day. 

Ate far less though, as breakfast all the way through till lunch simply comprised of cigarettes and large barrels of coffee.

I thought I'd look and see what health benefits would occur under this newly discovered additional bout of abstinence that's joined the ones of sex, recreational helpers, and the way its going - alcohol, all careering off into the distance, without a religious conversion anywhere in sight!

Time

The theory

The actual

20 minutes

Blood pressure and pulse returns to normal.

From all the blood pressure and pulse tests I have had done in the past, better than most non-smokers let alone smokers.

no

8 hours

Nicotine and carbon monoxide levels in blood reduce by ½, oxygen levels return to normal and circulation improves.

Oxygen and carbo levels were always very good.

no

24 hours

Carbon monoxide and nicotine levels are eliminated from the body.

Never noticed anything different here.

no

48 hours

Ability to taste and smell improves.

Well i can certainly begin to smell london. Didn't realise people bathed in cologne or perfume. Or seemingly nothing at all. Ewwww!

not sure

3 days

Breathing becomes easier as your bronchial tubes begin to relax.

Stopped sounding like a slightly old steam train first thing in the morning, so that's been a plus.

yes

Few days

Fingers lose their yellow stains and skin looks better.

Never ever had those yellow stained fingers. But could have been mistaken for one of the greys from roswell on a muggy dawn.

maybe

1 month

Appearance improves, skin loses greyish pallor and becomes less wrinkled.

A few days to go for this one, but the way the body's deciding to break out and looking more like a relief map of a rice pudding bowl, i'm starting to have my doubts.

starting to

3 – 9 months

Coughing and wheezing declines.

Shall wait and see.

tbc

1 year

Risk of heart attack reduces by half compared to that of a smoker.

As above.

tbc

10 years

Risk of lung cancer falls to about half that of a smoker.

As before.

tbc

15 years

Risk of coronary heart disease is the same as a non-smoker.

Aren't I dead or uploaded yet!

tbc

I do seem to need more sleep - if that were possible. But that would cut into the 16 hours I spend in front of the computer screen, anyway. 

Eating more, but have cut down on alcohol, down from 1818+units (and had to check a couple of times to make sure) a month to less than 15 units a month.   The upshot is that i will have to take up some form of exercise; there's only so much leeway hereditary genetics will allow the body, before it irrecoverably passes beyond pear shape. 

On this the turn of a cusp week i'm starting to feel something hinting of a beneficial turn, the skin is starting to feel as if its mine again. 

Along with that, the past few months have seen an increase in the flats population of greenery. Help combat the diesel/petrol fumes pouring in from the street as well as gaseous exhausts from my ever increasing bean-laden diet, by adding wonderful surplus amounts of oxygen into the air.  But just in case it does, I'll need to take more antioxidants (fruit/veg and vitamin/mineral supplementation) to combat the potential increase in free radical.

p45's

Amused by the increasing appearance on tv of people who have joined the lengthening unemployment queues. My advise?  Don't worry or panic. It will only become unmanageable if you really let it get to you.  Cut down what you can, cut out what you can sensibly cut out, ensure you eat properly.  As if you let that go, you could end up as a dreaded er statistic.

Liberty?

Sigh. The laudable cry of sovereignty once more rings out as new eu elections are set to take place, in less than three months time.

It's always worrying listening to people who are more intent of talking over and interrupting people to ensure their point is heard when cameras are rolling.  But who's interest does the multi-mill/billionaire business leaders serve, since very rarely does it appear to truly benefit the general populace?  Oh right theirs. No doubt someone somewhere will believe its a microsoft or chinese or russian plot to derail and destabilise the eu powerhouse from the inside.

There must be many people in constituent countries who are able to name ten members of their parliamentary betters and at least five of their eu reps. Why, here in the uk there's jacqs, gord, vince, dave (at least six of them), and for the eu, there's... er.... where's me list...

But when the time arrives i'll have read the blurbs, gone with me guts and scratched my green name; so later down the line I can say "I was robbed" and "that was a bloody wasted vote" with a modicum of self-righteous contentedness.

Yippee!  By 2018 every new built building in the eu will be required to produce as much energy as they consume.  2018?  Nine years time?  The rise in sea-level will probably have put paid to that, as the mad scramble to build-build-build to relocate coastline refugees picks up a soggy pace, and the last thing people will be thinking about is "does it have a pump!"  Just give everyone a windmill-hat and solar powered kinetic boots.

Tuesday, 31 March 2009

A europe any fundamental corporate fascist would be proud of

If that's not you, click below

blackout-EU-150-1 (1)

"The European Parliament may be about to surrender absolute power over the Internet to the telecom operators.

Under the false premise that market and competition rules will solve all problems, MEPs are about to agree to "Net discrimination" in amendments pushed by AT&T, the UK and French governments..."

Thursday, 19 March 2009

Oh blimey

Blimey, I can almost feel one coming.

But in the meantime here's a quick peek...

panaro1

On other unrelated peeks...
"Right then, let's sort out these training schemes. Who first for a certificate learning how to open a newspaper and turn a page? What, no takers? Okay how about learning how to answer the telephone? No!!! You people are never satisfied."

Meanwhile, thousands of miles away and hours apart ...

"Who wants to do nanotechnology or bio-technology and xenotectonics before taking a break?"

Thursday, 1 January 2009

And a happy new year

I would like to think that 2009 would bring a newly found level of inspired politics, hope and decision making.

But the past 2009 years (going from the christian calendar), haven't exactly brought much in the way of new year peace, happiness, contentedness or well being for the globes population.  Naturally such a sweeping statement doesn't affect a small minority, who will always be fine - regardless.  The vast majority however, will continue to be sidetracked by the petty existence of every day survival, higher loftier thoughts only mulled over by those with the time, the space, the wherewithal to contemplate and hopefully distill, nourishing nuggets down to the rest of us.

So, despite evidence to the contrary, here's to wishing everyone a wonderful and fantastic 2009.

Saturday, 27 December 2008

Government and "yeehaw" training

In this day and age you would think the governments "joined up thinking" would have a included the sensible approach to making sure the increasing millions soon to hit the dole queues, would be eligible to have training.

You know, to keep their skills up. To ensure that when the country pops out of the depression, we'll be in fighting fit form to take on the world and hold our own with a huge array of newly trained and qualified people champing at the bit with a new found vigour, highly toned skills and boundless reams of energy.

You would have thought!

Sadly, this government thinks otherwise and from september 2009 are bringing in a bizarre system, where they will provide funds for people to be trained. They will actually provide 100% of the funding. But with one small proviso. They will give the training providers 20% of the training costs up front. And then (and here's the kicker) they will fund the other 80% once (so making the magic sum of 100%), the unemployed person has found gainful employment within 6 months of them finishing the training course and been unemployed for 6 months.

So? I hear the cry go up, they're getting training, providers are getting paid?

Well imagine this scenario. You're at work and your bosses come up with a scheme, where instead of you getting paid your monthly salary all in one foul swoop, they give you 20%, and say that if you do a really good job and bring in outstanding results at the 1/2 yearly review stage they'll give you the other 80% of your salary in six months time, if you can keep it up.

Happy with it now?

The governments cack-handed approach to this has of course meant that meaningful providers who would have given the unemployed meaningful achievable training routes back into employment or self-employment, are now pulling out in droves. Leaving the really bad, or the ones who can use this now endless supply of even cheaper labour (as they'll get even more money into their coffers), as the only things left for those seriously unemployed; who could well end up to be a new underclass, permanently pinned on the spokes of poverty.

This might have worked when the economy was booming and bust defeated, and jobs were like confetti on ticker tape day. But in the current cooling clime, it is one of the worst ideas they have come up and stuck with.

Once people realise it, the ranks of the disaffected and jump-shippers could finally become a stampede.

Naturally when it is brought in and fails, they will blame the providers for not living up to the schemes expectations. Instead of them standing up, throwing their hands in the air and just going "yep, we cocked up."

This is nothing but a rear-guard action, by a rear-guard rump of a government, for which everyone else is to blame for everything's that happening, and they happily waft about losing the precious few tenuous grips on reality that they once had.

The one happy thought which trickles through peoples mind is, like dust in a storm, they'll be summarily kicked out of power come the prevailing electoral wind. Will things get any better afterwards? Oh where is my sick bag.

We are interconnected as never before. Our prioritise used to be small; the family, the village, the town, the city, the county, then the country states. But we've reached a stage where what happens on one side of the world, will in seconds impact the another. We have to think of ourselves as global citizens, and not the old insular back-biting, back stabbing, parochial entities of old. We have to go beyond the "every person for themselves" motto as that's plainly failed, in all its iterations.

"We are a species that goes beyond our limitations," says Ray Kurzweil. A shame governments religions, and fundamental fruitbats try to place so many restrictions hindering the pace of change, pace of development and pace of fairness for the whole of humankind.

And talking of wheels coming off wagons. Oh dear. Is this already the start of the end, of the obama love-in?

And in keeping with the time of diy, here's my wee little homage to the season of happiness.

Friday, 19 December 2008

With minutes to spare

Just when it looks as if the second brain cells died, it kicks back into life, and with minutes to spare.  So here it is...

Another look at the special christmas countdown; as doom and gloom is scattered around with more liberal abandonment, than anyone knows what to do with.

6xmas

Thursday, 18 December 2008

End of year thoughts - part iii

As good as seeing water turned to wine and world peace announced would be, things just won't be the same.

  1. The few remaining doctors discover a new form of hallucinogenic mushroom growing in the dampness of reservoirs used by the ruling elite in zimbabwe for their drinking water; but are shot as traitors, when they try to administer detox programs.
  2. England win a cricket series 5-0.  The hedgehog cricket series.
  3. Sterling plunges to an all time low against a basket of currencies, as a journalist breaks a remarkable story.  Clambering down a beanstalk, the out of breath daring reporter babbled a story about gold reserves and egg shapes!
  4. China, now the worlds cameras have gone, continues its rounding up of dissidents.  But unlike the old days, dissidents now have greater options under the march towards equality; to be used as canon shot, or as the target.
  5. The un officially declares zimbabwe a dead zone and launches a scathing attack on some of its spineless neighbours.
  6. During the christmas address, the queen experiences momentary confusion and recalls the good old days of blair, sorry thatcher, no atlee.
  7. With the lack of after-office appointments, dinner invitations, or even publishing deals coming his way.  Ex-pres george does a 30 second television advert for clark's shoes.
  8. Fat people are people, who simply have a medical problem - they can't keep their mouths shut.
  9. On an unrelated note, a growing number of dentists have been spotted lurking outside the doors of the nations fast food joints, as a new points system for wiring peoples jaw shut, comes into force.
  10. There is huge rejoicing in the union at the outlawing of slavery.  Sadly the british government blows hearty raspberries in the direction of the rest of the continent, and says it's their prerogative to ensure the peasants are flogged before work, flogged during work and flogged twice after work.  Just to make sure they're working.

But onto a more festive theme...

7xmas

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Ah where's my precious

After spending two days zombified mortified and petrified, with time zipping off into the sunset, the count continues.

Some currencies are up, some are down.  More murders, killings, rapes, pillaging, plots, stabbing's, charity, love and hope.  More nano, less nano, better medicines, more lawsuits.  There are now more people in the world with more time on their hands.  More time to relax and look back on those hectic years of madness they've wasted.  Some to enjoy the freedom of their gardens, some to spend the time idling behind firm barred doors pretending to be lucy, and yet others soldering on hoping for the time of change.

Think that about sums it up for the past couple of days.

9xmas 

8xmas