I'm amazed how many people manage to find their way to this little rancid backwater of the interweebs, so i offer a curmudgeonly acknowledgement, whilst briefly wondering what you do for a living, as you you really must have nothing else better to do with your life than browse the web 24 hours a day!
For a while now, i've been succumbing to a maelstrom of inward angst causing me to mentally cook up new methods of despatching neighbours - after enduring 10 weeks (so far) of refurbishment: drilling, tiling, hammering; you would too, or be holidaying away somewhere nice and cool to regain some element of composure if your every waking moment was subject to 100+dB noise. Did i just say neighbours? I meant neighbours, shoppers and generally everyone i have the disagreeable misfortune of bumping into.
But even all of that combined with the thoughts of a further eight weeks of the same (this time on the other side) to take place, failed to prick my bubble of miserableness, nor locomate my fingers to swifkey all on their own.
However, somewhere amongst the mossy corners, disturbing thoughts and images caused me to increasingly twitch and cry out; screaming awake in the dead of day with sweat pouring from my orifices and the duvet not attempting to strangling me... Murray wins wimbledon... bah! England win at rugby... bah! The 2012 london olympics finally pays for itself and is making a profit?... bah! New royal baby?... bah!
What is this country coming to? It's starting to become covered in a smug over-weaning milieu of joy.
Mark my words, it'll all end in tears; and it will be tears the size of footballs smashing the glass-houses of happiness and jollity to smithereens!